Thursday, February 3, 2011

When do I feel like a grown-up?

Because I certainly don't feel like one right now.  And I am already twenty years old.

This is something that arguably I have been struggling with for a while.  But today I was driving to campus and realized that I most definitely do not consider myself as having entered "adulthood."  That word is very scary to me.  As a twenty year old, there truly is not that much for which I am 100% responsible.  Yes, legally, I am no longer a minor, but do I do anything truly independently?

The older (but only by two years) brother of one of my best friends is getting married in May and I received a save-the-date card, sent to me ALONE.  Not my parents with a "and Hailie" attached to the end of their name.  NO.  My OWN save-the-date card.  Does that mean I need to be a grown-up now?

I hope not.

When do I have to start buying Christmas presents for my cousins/aunts/uncles on my own, and not just contribute to the gifts my parents buy?
When do I start paying my own cell phone bill?  Insurance?
I for sure want to go to grad school, so does all of this start when I graduate from that?
Twenty just sounds like I should have my stuff together.  What? Who are we trying to kid here?!  I am a complete MESS. 

Perfect song to illustrate my thoughts today:
Ben, you know my soul.

SIDENOTE:  I am putting myself out there today.  I am applying for a few different things...just wait and see what happens, I will be sure to let you all know.  This may or may not be directly contributing to my feeling old/young/awkwardly in-between.

What age bracket do I fall under?  Is there a title for this?  Not a teen.  Student sounds so high-school to me.  Young adult...neg. Young professional- there's nothing professional about me! I am not a twenty-something, am I?!

All my love,

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